FUCK these stupid short descriptions!

Monday, May 15, 2006, 8:54 p.m.

I am so overcome with amazement that I am home from work before it's fully dark out that I am going to bite the bullet and write an entry which will probably be boring, just because I have some time to myself to write it.

So THERE.

Before I begin the boringness, though, I'd like to mention that I have been re-visiting The Waifs, who(m) I saw perform with Bob Dylan a few years ago, and who rock. Download their song "Bridal Train" from whichever illegal music-downloading source you use, because then you will immediately want to go out and legally purchase their other stuff. And maybe if enough of you do it, they'll notice, and be so grateful that they'll come and play music for me in my living room.

Okay, so now that I've filled my Run-On Sentence Quota for the next several years ...

I was actually pretty productive today.

I know! It goes against all of my principles. But it couldn't be helped.

The put-the-newspaper-together-in-three-days-with-no-help-or-thanks-and-then-go-back-and-do-it-all-over-again cycle has begun again for my co-worker(s) and me. We were really short on content for the Sports section today. Usually that's a precursor to the Frustration And Anger Party we like to throw for ourselves pretty regularly, but today I decided I was going to stick my neck out there and (dum dadum DUMMM) write a Sports Commentary.

Okay, so have I ever mentioned that I am not, as they say, "athletic"? That I am more, as they say, "lazy as a fucking slug"? All right, so if that wasn't as clear as a stripper's heels before, let it be known now -- I am not Into Sports. Unless they involve My Couch and Potato Chips and Booze.

Which is why, when I announce, "I will write a Sports Commentary!" people in my office tend to die a little inside. Especially because the last Sports commentary I wrote had to do with new exercises (for example, the Stand-In-Place) which I thought should be introduced into our physical fitness regimen, and it subsequently, inexplicably, won an Army Journalism award. Another victory for laziness!

But today I decided to go in a different, more active direction, and write about the Street Luge, which is lot like the regular luge, except potentially WAY more painful.

Aaaaand ... I'll have to post that tomorrow, because I don't have it with me right now.

For now, I am too tired to think of any intelligent way to conclude this entry, so go check this out, and hate me for it later.